26 April 2013

This 'n' That

Warning: It is very likely that I am about to offend someone with the following question. No, it has nothing to do with Calvinism vs. Arminianism. It doesn't concern an issue of eschatology. It doesn't even have to do with Chicago elephants. What, then, is this query of mine? Well, if you're ready, here it is: What is the deal with wind chimes?

photo: Jaako via photopin cc
I just do not understand this outdoor decoration that, in reality, is far more than a decoration. The wind chime somewhat rudely and without asking permission imposes itself upon the neighbors of its owner, forcing all within earshot to listen unceasingly to its racket. Further, the noise that the wind chime produces is not even a particularly pretty or soothing one, but rather one that could, over time, incite your neighbor to steal it away in the night so that silence might finally be achieved.

At this juncture I wish that I could effortlessly segue into some deep, theological point. Not only would it demonstrate that I still love my wind chime-owning brethren (I do!), but it also would reveal my amazing ability to concoct really lame sermon illustrations. But, alas, I have no such point to make. What, then, can you take away from these brief paragraphs? This: If you own a wind chime, I can be your friend, but I cannot be your neighbor.

Now that I've lost my wind chime-wielding readers (and I do hope that you'll come back), the rest of you may sit back, listen to whatever may be sounding outside of your own windows, and enjoy your week in review (kind of):
  • Is it unloving to call out false teachers?
  • Wisconsin schools are indoctrinating eighth-graders with something as innocent as a crossword puzzle.
  • Sometimes you just want to look pretty.
  • Wait a minute. . .are you saying that faith healing doesn't work? So sad that the children of this couple are the victims.
  • Speaking of God's judgment, Elevation Church is expanding again.
  • Since September 11, 2001, the number of Saudi students in the US has increased 500%.
  • I think cell phones should be banned while driving. I've witnessed far too many close calls because people are more concerned about texting or talking than they are with the fact that they are in control of a moving vehicle.
  • Closet Calvinist shares part two of why people are so offended by Calvinism.
  • I'm looking forward to delving into S. Lewis Johnson's compilation of sermons about the divine purpose.
  • If you're going to steal a sermon from another pastor, at least swipe a good one.
  • Let's live in light of the fact that we are slaves of Christ:

12 comments:

  1. I discovered your blog a few months ago and I enjoy reading the different topics you cover. I always look forward to your This 'n That posts but this one sent me into fits of laughter. By the way, I am one of those wind chime nuts. I have three outside and one inside. Don't worry, I live way out in the country so I can't annoy anyone. :-)

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    1. Whew! Glad you were laughing, Tammy! I'd hate to offend a loyal reader, even if you are a wind chime nut! :-)

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  2. I love wind chimes! But one day I was reading and I noticed that my lovely chime was bothering me. It never had before...hmmm. I figured that if the tinkles of my own wind chime could suddenly bother *me*, it must be driving the lady next door C.R.A.Z.Y. (even though she never said anything). I cut the chime bell off. Now is it a silent chime, wafting gently and noiselessly in the air. As for her child's intermittent high-pitched shrieks...well, I guess I have some payback noise to endure on my end!

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  3. I figure that your houses are too close if you can hear your neighbors wind chimes. I've been to many front doors and some wind chimes are quite beautiful and others are annoying like the pipes are just worn or cheap.

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  4. Don't worry - I have a wind chime but it was made incorrectly, or made by a wind chime hater (?) and it doesn't make a sound and hardly moves when the wind blows. It just looks cute!

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  5. Always wondered how often pastors plagiarize each others sermons...

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  6. No weekly dose of adorable? :-( Where's my wind chime? Lol

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    1. Look again. It's there. I personally dislike the weekly dose of A but it's Ebenz's blog. I love everything else.

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  7. Well who knew you are a wind chime hater, Ebenz. But I still love you and always look forward to your Friday This 'n' That posts. Keep up the good fight and watch out for elephant poop. The piles are growing around Chicagoland.

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  8. When pastors plagiarize sermons…it’s a huge problem…if only we could have some kind of warning when it happens…when the pastor opens his mouth to speak…some kind of little signal…like an annoying wind chimes sound…in the background…wouldn’t that be great? :-) Carol

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  9. Wind chimes are nothing - what about barking dogs? They drive me batty. I like dogs, but when they start barking, they need a muzzle. In the owner's manual for dog ownership, there needs to be a section on keeping your dog quiet, unless your life is threatened. Not sure there is anything theological about noisy barking dogs, but there should be.

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  10. EBenz, I think you and Chris R. should start paying more attention to what is going on in Willow Creek... I personally think this is the largest cult in the Chicago area with national and international influence. A cult which massively perverts and corrupts the Gospel with its psychologizing and emotionalizing it and its Hagelian dialectic and a cult which within next few years will officially affirm pro homosexual line of propaganda.

    ~ Despeville

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